Sunday, January 4, 2009

6 Things I Learned During "Vacation"

I can sum it up in one sentence: Life is hard.

What I learned:
1. You can have a talk with your husband about your relationship. He can give reasons, apologize, and say he'll try harder but these changes don't happen overnight and the process of improving can still be painful and full of loneliness. Marriage is hard enough and having children with special needs just means you really have to be more careful to not lose yourselves in it all.

2. Logan's ADHD has improved since the last vacation but it still needs a lot of work. He's still oppositional. He's still hyperactive. I'm still wondering how much the DAN! protocol has helped. I'm asking for a sign to tell me that things are working.

3. I have enormous respect for his teachers. They must try so hard with him. I have such a hoarse voice now which is funny because I used to work with the NYU Voice Center as their publicist on this very problem of mothers ending up with hoarse voices because of their kids. Parenting and teaching requires endless talking. I have a sexy smoker voice right now. If you have the same problem, check out this page to get your voice sounding like you again: http://www.med.nyu.edu/voicecenter/patient/tips/vocal_health.html

4. My drugs help me tremendously to deal with the stress of handling the two of them without a structured schedule. I have also started drinking wine at night, not too much though as that can be counterproductive and painful in the morning. Wine, anti-depressants, and Klonopin can help take the edge off when you're stressed but if you are sad, nothing helps.

5. I can get a lot done if I plan ahead. This vacation, I managed to get Logan's private evals for neuropsych, speech, and OT. We also squeezed in a OB visit for me and a dental appointment for Logan.

6. I have friends who care about me and some learned about my challenges for the first time after I started this blog. Today, my friend Angela from California sent me flowers. I was so surprised. I gave the deliveryman the third degree before I opened the door for him. I really couldn't believe someone would send me flowers.

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